Here we are two days AFTER the first official Sunday morning service of Vineyard Church of Rock Hill, and it feels like we're kind of hanging in the "glow" of everything this weekend meant. I know this probably feels more significant to Ben and I just because this has been something like 7 years of God working in our hearts to plant a church, but I'm pretty sure everyone who was there Sunday morning would agree that God was moving. If there was one way to describe this past Sunday morning, it would just be "the sweet presence of Jesus." It was better than we dreamed it would be! (Yes, I cried practically the whole morning.) :)
Funny story though... Sunday morning I tried my best to get the kids out the door. I ended up waking them all up early (it somehow feels inherently wrong to me to wake my kids up... this is probably why we homeschool.) :) Not that we were going to be late for church, but I really wanted to get there early enough that I might actually get to help Ben and the others set out the signs and breakfast. It was like herding turtles to get them to the van, so I may or may not have punched the steering wheel when I finally got everyone in, turned the key, and the van wouldn't start. I actually wasn't surprised the van wouldn't start because a bolt has rusted off that holds the battery in place, so any time it wiggles out of place, the cable doesn't connect right... we just have to push the battery back into place and wiggle the cable to get it going again. It shouldn't be a hard fix once we finally have the time to take it to the garage, but we've just put it off because October has been so busy.
ANYWAY, I got out, tried to pop the hood... and it wouldn't open. I tried again. And again. I came to the conclusion the latch was broken. After 5 minutes (or maybe it was one, but just felt like five), I pulled out my phone to call Ben. Somehow I had turned on the Bible app on my phone in my pocket, so when I pulled it out, the "verse of the day" was waiting right there for me. It said, "Do not worry about tomorrow, for there is enough evil in today." (Not sure what translation it was, I just remember the "evil" part.) Argggghhh!! About that time, Micah said, "Hey Mom, I think you forgot to pull the lever inside the van first." What a smart kid. In my haste, I HAD forgotten to pop it from the inside first. Hood popped, cable wiggled, van started, we were on our way! His eye is on the sparrow... :)
I wish you all could have been there to experience our first morning. We had breakfast at 9:30 while the kids ran wildly around us... then sent the kids with Mike and Carrie to their classroom around 9:50... then Karl and Lindsey led us in worship starting around 10:10 (we purposefully started worship AFTER 10 - even though we "advertised" that the service starts at 10 - to place an emphasis on allowing people to fellowship over food first), and then Ben gave an awesome sermon. I love hearing my husband preach, and he had a lot stored up. :) He spoke on Exodus 33 where God told the Israelites that they could have the Promised Land but that He would not go with them... and Moses's response that he would rather stay in the desert and have the presence of God than to gain the Promised Land but lose the Lord. This is our same prayer for the church... as long as we have the presence of Jesus, it doesn't matter if we're small or large, thriving or limping along. Just give us Jesus! This felt like the theme of our prayer time Saturday evening, and it felt like what we experienced a taste of Sunday morning. The Lord is so good!
For those who like a little something to listen to, you can click on this link to listen to Ben's sermon:
http://rockhillvineyard.org/content.cfm?id=327
For those wondering about our attendance, I think we had something like 25 adults and 17 kids... the grown-ups weren't actually outnumbered like we thought we might be! Besides the team, we had some folks who have already "joined up" with us, some others who are exploring the Vineyard, and a few friends who are already involved in other churches but who came to "show the love" on our first service anyway. We even had one couple come who said they had been watching our website for months waiting to see when we would have Sunday morning services because they had been involved in a Vineyard church in Kentucky before they moved to the area and they missed it so much! (We went out to lunch with them plus a bunch of other folks after church and we really like them... I hope they decide to be "keepers". :))
We can't wait for November 16th! In the meantime, we'll enjoy "being the church" in everyday life, outside of Sunday mornings, and with other local churches. I love me the Body of Christ!
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
Wednesday, October 15, 2014
Four days left!
In just four short days, we'll have our first "preview" Sunday morning service. We got word from the YMCA roughly 2 weeks ago that we can indeed use their facilities for a price we can afford, so it's off and running and everyone is scrambling to get it all done! I keep saying, "I can't wait to get started", although I probably need to bite my tongue and remember that we HAVE gotten started. That's what this past year has been about because Sunday mornings do not make a church... the people/relationships do. I guess Sunday mornings just makes it a little more "official" feeling. :)
I read a devotional this morning with my kids that describes well how I've felt about this church-planting adventure so far. It's from the book, "Thoughts to Make Your Hearts Sing" by Sally Lloyd-Jones.
"When you were little, did someone big ever carry you? Did you rest your head on his shoulder, lean your whole weight on him? Faith is leaning your whole weight on God. Resting your head on his shoulder. Faith means resting - relying - not on who we are, or what we can do, or how we feel, or what we know. Faith is resting in who God is and what he has done. And he has done EVERYTHING." It occurs to me that I could carry Abby sleeping in my arms all the way to China (figuratively speaking... she's heavy!), and when she wakes up, she would be in China although she never actually took a single step. Somehow, we might actually see a church grow here in Rock Hill, SC, and it's like we're just "waking up" to what God has been doing.
Because this is our first service, we aren't promoting it much because we know there will be details and kinks to work out (like who is going to take care of certain details Sunday morning, exactly what would be the best way to direct people through the YMCA maze to the room where we are meeting, etc.) We've invited the few people who have already "joined up" with us and some others who have expressed interest in gathering with the Vineyard. For all we know, there may only be 10 of us there this Sunday, but there will definitely be the presence of the Lord. We feel like the little kid being carried in his Daddy's arms, and we know that's the only way to keep building a "church."
I was thinking this morning of all the ways God has provided for our church, and all the people he has "perfectly" aligned with us. When Ben needed to buy a computer for the church, he talked to one friend who knew exactly what we needed and even donated some money toward it. When we needed to research printers, he talked to a friend in the printer business who just said "Here's what you need and here's how to get the best deal." Same thing with projectors. It would have taken us FOREVER to sort through all the details trying to figure out that stuff, but we "happened" to know just the right people to talk to. We needed a logo, a website, and a million other little papers... no problem, we've got an awesome graphic designer on our team (Lindsey.) We needed signs for the church. Lindsey kicked butt designing them and Mike works for a sign company who donated the signs. (We just had to buy the stands.) We needed sound equipment and microphones. Karl knew the details of what was important to get, and amazingly, instead of tracking down each piece of equipment (using a pretty strict budget), he found a church about an hour away that sold us EVERYTHING we needed (minus a microphone) for close to HALF the price of what it was worth. (Side note: it turns out Karl is also amazing at putting down quarter-round and flooring... a fact that has come in very handy to us in our new house. :)) Ben ordered a projector through amazon.com, but before it processed, a Vineyard pastor 2 hours away texted and said, "Hey, do you guys need a projector? We've got a really good extra one you can have." Just in time to cancel the amazon order at no cost. :)
I'm still amazed that God moved people here with us from two parts of Ohio and Kansas whose giftings are perfect... the Buchers are gifted worship leaders, Mike Zieber actually went to seminary specifically because of his calling to work with children and families (and kids FLOCK to him and Carrie and their girls), and the Hanfords are amazing at hospitality and naturally building deep relationships. Plus, Seth's whole job is computer security so he knows all about techy stuff.... and kind of everything else. (Seriously, he's a walking encyclopedia. Sometimes when Micah asks me a question during homeschool and I don't want to take the time to look it up, I tell him to ask Seth next time we see him.) Rachel has worked at Panera for years and loves to bake, so we're serving a GOOD breakfast every Sunday! (Also, since Carrie is kind of a professional at making the best cheesecakes you've ever tasted, I'm sure we'll make that come in handy somewhere. Winning people to the Lord one cheesecake at a time!) I'm pretty sure Ben and I are just along for the ride with this group. As long as Ben preaches a sermon now and then, I guess we'll earn our keep. :)
In other Ganson news, the painting and flooring is done in our new house (minus a few details), and we are starting to move things in. There's still a million smaller things to be done, but it's definitely livable at this point! Hopefully we'll be staying in it by next Thursday or Friday night... that might actually be possible, especially if any more soccer games get canceled due to weather like they were last night.
We've had a busy few weeks, and there's more to come. Please pray for this Sunday especially!
I read a devotional this morning with my kids that describes well how I've felt about this church-planting adventure so far. It's from the book, "Thoughts to Make Your Hearts Sing" by Sally Lloyd-Jones.
"When you were little, did someone big ever carry you? Did you rest your head on his shoulder, lean your whole weight on him? Faith is leaning your whole weight on God. Resting your head on his shoulder. Faith means resting - relying - not on who we are, or what we can do, or how we feel, or what we know. Faith is resting in who God is and what he has done. And he has done EVERYTHING." It occurs to me that I could carry Abby sleeping in my arms all the way to China (figuratively speaking... she's heavy!), and when she wakes up, she would be in China although she never actually took a single step. Somehow, we might actually see a church grow here in Rock Hill, SC, and it's like we're just "waking up" to what God has been doing.
Because this is our first service, we aren't promoting it much because we know there will be details and kinks to work out (like who is going to take care of certain details Sunday morning, exactly what would be the best way to direct people through the YMCA maze to the room where we are meeting, etc.) We've invited the few people who have already "joined up" with us and some others who have expressed interest in gathering with the Vineyard. For all we know, there may only be 10 of us there this Sunday, but there will definitely be the presence of the Lord. We feel like the little kid being carried in his Daddy's arms, and we know that's the only way to keep building a "church."
I was thinking this morning of all the ways God has provided for our church, and all the people he has "perfectly" aligned with us. When Ben needed to buy a computer for the church, he talked to one friend who knew exactly what we needed and even donated some money toward it. When we needed to research printers, he talked to a friend in the printer business who just said "Here's what you need and here's how to get the best deal." Same thing with projectors. It would have taken us FOREVER to sort through all the details trying to figure out that stuff, but we "happened" to know just the right people to talk to. We needed a logo, a website, and a million other little papers... no problem, we've got an awesome graphic designer on our team (Lindsey.) We needed signs for the church. Lindsey kicked butt designing them and Mike works for a sign company who donated the signs. (We just had to buy the stands.) We needed sound equipment and microphones. Karl knew the details of what was important to get, and amazingly, instead of tracking down each piece of equipment (using a pretty strict budget), he found a church about an hour away that sold us EVERYTHING we needed (minus a microphone) for close to HALF the price of what it was worth. (Side note: it turns out Karl is also amazing at putting down quarter-round and flooring... a fact that has come in very handy to us in our new house. :)) Ben ordered a projector through amazon.com, but before it processed, a Vineyard pastor 2 hours away texted and said, "Hey, do you guys need a projector? We've got a really good extra one you can have." Just in time to cancel the amazon order at no cost. :)
I'm still amazed that God moved people here with us from two parts of Ohio and Kansas whose giftings are perfect... the Buchers are gifted worship leaders, Mike Zieber actually went to seminary specifically because of his calling to work with children and families (and kids FLOCK to him and Carrie and their girls), and the Hanfords are amazing at hospitality and naturally building deep relationships. Plus, Seth's whole job is computer security so he knows all about techy stuff.... and kind of everything else. (Seriously, he's a walking encyclopedia. Sometimes when Micah asks me a question during homeschool and I don't want to take the time to look it up, I tell him to ask Seth next time we see him.) Rachel has worked at Panera for years and loves to bake, so we're serving a GOOD breakfast every Sunday! (Also, since Carrie is kind of a professional at making the best cheesecakes you've ever tasted, I'm sure we'll make that come in handy somewhere. Winning people to the Lord one cheesecake at a time!) I'm pretty sure Ben and I are just along for the ride with this group. As long as Ben preaches a sermon now and then, I guess we'll earn our keep. :)
In other Ganson news, the painting and flooring is done in our new house (minus a few details), and we are starting to move things in. There's still a million smaller things to be done, but it's definitely livable at this point! Hopefully we'll be staying in it by next Thursday or Friday night... that might actually be possible, especially if any more soccer games get canceled due to weather like they were last night.
We've had a busy few weeks, and there's more to come. Please pray for this Sunday especially!
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
We're still here!
It's been on my mind for a while now that I better post SOMETHING, so that no one thinks we're dead. Here is my list of excuses for not posting anything in four months:
1) My husband is super awesome at always sending out monthly church-planting updates via email. He's kind of like clockwork. So if you REALLY want to know what's going on (on a regular basis) and you haven't already asked to be on that email list, let us know and we'll add you! His email address is ben@rockhillvineyard.org
2) Ben also told me a while ago that he started a blog post (one of his "it's been a long time since I preached and I have thoughts that need to get out" posts), but it's been sitting in the draft page for a month or more. So it's his fault too.
3) There is some sort of radar in my kids that goes off when I am either on the computer or on the phone. It signals that it is time to whine, cry, fight, cling, or otherwise cause havoc. Thus I've acquired an aversion to sitting at the computer for longer than 10 minutes at a time.
4) I'm unfortunately task-oriented and a lover of efficiency. And since this blog isn't always on the top of my list, and since reason #3 is detrimental to efficiency, I've pushed it off several times even though I kind of enjoy it.
Now that I am fully justified, here's a quick recap of where we're at:
We continue to covet your prayers. We know the Lord has a plan for absolutely everything; pray that we would be discerning in where he is leading us and that we don't try to run ahead of him.
1) My husband is super awesome at always sending out monthly church-planting updates via email. He's kind of like clockwork. So if you REALLY want to know what's going on (on a regular basis) and you haven't already asked to be on that email list, let us know and we'll add you! His email address is ben@rockhillvineyard.org
2) Ben also told me a while ago that he started a blog post (one of his "it's been a long time since I preached and I have thoughts that need to get out" posts), but it's been sitting in the draft page for a month or more. So it's his fault too.
3) There is some sort of radar in my kids that goes off when I am either on the computer or on the phone. It signals that it is time to whine, cry, fight, cling, or otherwise cause havoc. Thus I've acquired an aversion to sitting at the computer for longer than 10 minutes at a time.
4) I'm unfortunately task-oriented and a lover of efficiency. And since this blog isn't always on the top of my list, and since reason #3 is detrimental to efficiency, I've pushed it off several times even though I kind of enjoy it.
Now that I am fully justified, here's a quick recap of where we're at:
- Summer was pretty relationship-heavy for everyone. Since I knew playdates would be harder to do once homeschool started up again, I tried to get together with friends several times a week. There was also some traveling, and a lot of our team traveled as well for family reunions, etc.
- Mike and Carrie Zieber (Ben's sister) and their four girls moved to Rock Hill to help with the church plant, and since they bought a little fixer-upper, we've spent a good bit of time helping them get it all settled. The Hanford's have also just moved into a house that Amanda's Dad bought here in Rock Hill. Us Ganson's are looking for a house to buy so we can save a little money when our lease is up here in October. (Rent in Rock Hill is ridiculous. Buying, though a little more expensive than what we were used to in Ohio, is much more reasonable, and would save us a good amount of money every month. Plus I could -hopefully - have STORAGE!! And a washing machine that holds more than four towels!! And a living room/dining room/kitchen area that is big enough for us to stop tripping over each other!! And NO light berber carpet that shows every piece of dirt!!! (or shows orange soda that your friends spill on the carpet before you even move in) :) Okay, in reality, I really am very thankful for the place we've been this year. It has worked out great, and I'm glad we rented at first. I just - as you can tell - have a few vices with the place. :)
- We just got back from a trip to Springfield. It's the first time we've been back in 10 months and it was FANTASTIC. We love so many people there like family, and it was especially good to visit VCN Sunday morning. Ben preached and then we had a lunch afterward. (When we pulled up to VCN, Caleb said, "THAT'S the church! That's the church I wanted to go to!" Every Sunday in South Carolina when we visit a church, Caleb always said, "Not this one! The OTHER one!")
- We are still searching for a building in which to hold Sunday services. Our hope was to do a monthly "preview" service October, November, and December, and then start weekly services in January, but if something doesn't open up soon we may have to postpone a little. Ben had slowed down the search a little because the facility we really wanted seemed like it was going to work out, but in the end, the cost was too high. There are still two other facilities that have expressed positive responses, but in true Southern style, it is very hard to nail down the person who needs to give the "yes" and to get a definite price. This is becoming priority 1.
- When people ask "How is it going?" it's hard to know what to say because we're trying not to base our "success" on normal, objective things, like how many people are "members" or how many "converts" we've had. We don't even have a Sunday morning service yet (or even structured "programs") which is when people tend to view us as "legitimate", so we can't tell you what attendance is like. What we do know is that our team has done an awesome job at building authentic relationships with folks. Of those people, some are definitely already following Christ, some are people who have some church background and would call themselves Christians but don't attend any church and might not be able to explain exactly what makes them a Christian , and a few are definitely not following Christ. There's also several great examples of people who seem to be growing closer to Jesus, and who have caught a bit of a spark or interest. I think we are close to being able to start two or three separate "community groups" within the next several months. If we started a Sunday service right now, our guess is that we might have between 30-50 people who would be regular attenders, but who knows! According to our church planting coaches through the Vineyard, we are right on track, whatever that means! :) And ALL of that - if it's even accurate - is just a reflection of God's faithfulness because the past 10 months (or closer to a year for the rest of the team) has not seemed at all like we really dug in and worked hard. There was a lot of hard emotional stuff that happened this year, and with lots of our team moving and issues with jobs and folks visiting from out-of-state and traveling ourselves, it's amazing that anyone on our team had time and energy to build relationships at all! But somehow it's working.
- For our family, we're also really praying for a new job breakthrough for Ben. He continues to valet at the Charlotte airport three 10-hour days a week, but we'd love to have something closer for him. Plus, the pay has decreased since the new valet company has taken over. The management has recognized Ben's leadership potential, and they have talked about promoting Ben to a supervisor which would be fantastic financially, but we don't know if that will actually pan out or not. Regardless, he has developed some great relationships with his co-workers. (They unfortunately just all live 45 minutes away from us or more!)
We continue to covet your prayers. We know the Lord has a plan for absolutely everything; pray that we would be discerning in where he is leading us and that we don't try to run ahead of him.
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
A few quick notes from Janelle....
- Tomorrow (Wednesday) is Ben's birthday. The big 3-4! Someone we recently met said he still looks like 25. I'm not sure if that's good or bad at this point. :)
- I now realize that I don't especially love meeting new people. I just want to have good friends. But you have to do one to get to the other! (I apologize to those of you who knew me from age 2 through about age 21. Somehow I used to be an extrovert by all appearances, but my theory is that was actually just immaturity.. either that or I am now a mild introvert by default because "alone time" sounds so foreign and exotic since I have young children.)
- Soccer has been so, so good for our family. Micah is truly loving it and I feel like there are a handful of really good relationships forming there between some of the other parents and us. We've got two more games and an end-of-soccer celebration coming up, but we have plans to continue getting together with some of them beyond soccer season.
- We were SO BLESSED last week when a special friend sent us a check and told us to use it for a family membership to the YMCA. He knew that we were considering it, but I'm not sure he knew how little room we had in our budget for it. Everyone tells us that summer in South Carolina is kind of like winter up north... you just don't go outside the house (or in this case, outside of air conditioning). We've been so easily interacting with people the past month or so because of the amazing weather, so we wanted to find someplace we could expect to build relationships INDOORS in the summer. I've already acquainted myself with a few women in some of the classes (I've only been to two classes, but I already have a new facebook friend from one of them! :)) and Ben is looking into some groups of guys that get together to play basketball. It feels like this is going to be a really good opportunity for us, both relationally and physically! Plus, the cool thing is that the night before we found out we were getting this check, Micah had just prayed at bedtime that we'd be able to join the Y. (He wants to play racquetball with Ben.) Ben shared about Micah's prayer with a guy at work, and his response was, "Hey, get that kid to pray for me!" :)
- This past Saturday evening was probably one of the most fun evenings we've had since we've been here. The weather was BEAUTIFUL so we sent out a message to most everyone we know that we were going to meet up at a local playground that has some picnic areas. Most of OUR new friends couldn't make it, but we had lots of friends-of-friends there, and it was just an awesome evening of hanging out with 15 or so people (plus a whole gaggle of kids). We even made some new friends at the park.
- It feels like our net is spreading wide, so to speak. We (and our other team members) have lots of relationships forming or slowly growing. It's sometimes hard to know which ones to pursue more intentionally and deeply, and which ones the Lord doesn't plan to go much further. We'll just keep praying for those people we encounter, and try to follow the Lord's leading in all of this. We're praying for a lot of "natural" conversations, and this seems to be happening regularly.
- I'd better be off to bed. Abby has (another) stomach bug, and I'm guessing a full night's rest is probably not in the books for either of us. We love and miss you all!
Sunday, March 23, 2014
Rain Clouds and Silver Linings
I suppose it's about time for another update. (Thank you, AGAIN, to my sister-in-law Machelle for emailing me to say "so what's up?" Updating this blog is often on my to-do list; it's just a matter of getting the "other stuff"... you know, like "feed and educate children"... OFF the list.) :)
To quote a better writer than myself, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...."
This past month or so has been hard on our team in many ways, especially the Hanfords. I guess I'll start with the yucky stuff first and get that out of the way.
As most of you know, Amanda's mom, Sue, was diagnosed with cancer back in November, and it has suddenly begun to progress rapidly. Doctors are no longer able to provide any treatments for her and she has been put in hospice care. The Hanfords are in Ohio this weekend with their family. If you pray for anything surrounding this church plant, please pray for this sweet family who has already been through so much.
We're also waiting to see what the Lord has planned for Mike and Carrie Zieber who are committed to joining us in Rock Hill as soon as Mike can find employment here. It seemed for a while like there was an almost-perfect fit at a sign company here in town, but the discussions there have drug on and fizzled out to the point that it looks like it probably won't work out. So they keep searching, and we all keep waiting.
Ben has also stepped up the job search/applications once again (although, honestly, he's never stopped looking since we got here.) He's still scheduled every afternoon to work a couple hours as a traffic cop for a local school system, and twice a week as a valet at the Charlotte airport. With the end of the school year 2 months away, we've known we need to find something to replace the traffic cop job. But a couple weeks ago we also learned the valet company lost their contract with the airport, so that job will be gone in June as well. (They also sent out an e-mail to their employees this past week warning them that they will begin laying people off sooner rather than later, so we really don't know how much longer Ben will have a job there.) We would LOVE it if Ben could find a decent-paying job here in Rock Hill with early morning/daytime hours (as opposed to evening hours) and good interaction with people.
Rachel has been struggling trying to get enough hours at Panera to keep her budget afloat, while also desiring a daytime job instead of 3rd shift. It looks like an on-call part-time job with another company has opened up for her, so that's great, but something still needs to change with her Panera employment situation!
On a totally DIFFERENT end of the spectrum, Karl Bucher is swamped with work and working long hours in construction/restoration/whatever it is he does. We're praying for change there as well, either a decrease in hours or a totally different job. This man has got some serious skills in wood-working and leather-work as well as horse-training, so it would be great if he could eventually provide for his family using a combination of these things he loves.
SO.... our team hasn't quite been just frolicking through a field of daisies, BUT there's an awful lot of good stuff happening too:
First of all, we had Ben's parents visit for an entire month! We've never had either set of parents living in the same city as us, and I have to say it was WONDERFUL to have "Grandma and Grandpa" here. They were such a huge help with the kids and our schedules, plus it was great to have someone of a "more mature generation" in our Community Group time. And besides that, we just like them. :)
Ben started coaching a city soccer team two weeks ago. Micah LOVES it and looks forward to every Tuesday and Thursday evening. It's just been practices so far and one little scrimmage game, but I have to admit, I haven't seen hardly a thing that happens on the field because I'm chatting with the parents on the sidelines. There are a couple of moms who seem especially "natural" to connect with, and Ben has been enjoying some of the dads. I'm hoping some of these folks are ones the Lord has "planned" for us. Our other team members have also been experiencing some really great breakthroughs in meeting and getting to know folks, especially since it's light out in the evenings and we have warmer days more and more frequently. (Side note: This winter has been unusually snowy/cloudy/chilly for South Carolina, but it feels like an AMAZING winter compared to what we're used to in Ohio. I can't overstate what it does for one's spirit to see so much SUNSHINE during these winter months! I am constantly thankful for that.)
We had a few people tell us a while back that here in the south, we would probably find that it's easy to meet people, but difficult to get "below the surface." Now that we've been here a few months, we're seeing bits and pieces of that. There are some relationships that naturally won't progress much further, like our neighbors (one of the first couples we had over for dinner) who are moving back to Charleston in a couple of weeks. Some relationships we originally formed have fizzled a little because of complications in schedules or sicknesses. (I think I've had play dates scheduled with one friend at least 5 times that had to be canceled because first her kids were sick, then my kids were sick, then her in-laws came for the week, and so on...) Other relationships seem to be deepening slowly but surely. So I guess we'll just keep moving forward, trying to stay sensitive to whatever the Lord is doing in each relationship.
A really great book our team has been going through is called "The Tangible Kingdom" by Hugh Halter and Matt Smay. These guys kind of "accidently" built a church just by building relationships with folks (no strings attached), and the book has been both a big encouragement and also a little daunting (like when they mentioned that they found it often took about 2 years for most of their relationships to deepen to the point where they had some "open doors" spiritually.) I think we've slowly been changing our mindsight from "We're here to build a church" to the mindset of "We're here to love people... and we're thinking in the midst of that, a church will be formed."
One of those things that seems to be a "God thing" is our new involvement with a place called Pilgrim's Inn. This is a place in town where homeless women and children can stay and get back on their feet. It's a very "holistic" approach, helping the women find jobs, get the support they need, find a place to live, totally transform their lives. We've been serving and eating dinner with them "family style" the last Wednesday of each month, and it has been a very natural, wonderful fit for our team. We're also thinking the Lord might have more in store for us there... this may be a possible place for Lindsey to start out leading Refit exercise classes, maybe even for us to start some Sunday morning services. These have just been thoughts or ideas so far, but I wouldn't be surprised if the Lord connects us more deeply with this organization and the women living there.
Speaking of Sunday mornings, we have absolutely nothing in stone, but at this point we are leaning towards starting regular Sunday morning gatherings in January. We'll probably do some "preview services" in the late fall, and maybe start doing some small "in home" services before that.
So that's the nutshell version of our life today. (Actually, if you want to know specifically what TODAY looked like, we skipped church because of yet another intestinal/stomach bug - the Buchers have it too - and I just put Caleb in time out for purposely farting on his brother AGAIN. It's a rainy, movie-watching kind of day, but more sunshine should be on its way later in the week.)
I'm still trying to figure out a more efficient way to move pictures from my phone to my computer, but when I do, I'll put a few up here. :)
****Sad update: about an hour after I published this blog post, we got the call that Sue, Amanda's Mom, has passed away. I know they could use lots of prayers.***
To quote a better writer than myself, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...."
This past month or so has been hard on our team in many ways, especially the Hanfords. I guess I'll start with the yucky stuff first and get that out of the way.
As most of you know, Amanda's mom, Sue, was diagnosed with cancer back in November, and it has suddenly begun to progress rapidly. Doctors are no longer able to provide any treatments for her and she has been put in hospice care. The Hanfords are in Ohio this weekend with their family. If you pray for anything surrounding this church plant, please pray for this sweet family who has already been through so much.
We're also waiting to see what the Lord has planned for Mike and Carrie Zieber who are committed to joining us in Rock Hill as soon as Mike can find employment here. It seemed for a while like there was an almost-perfect fit at a sign company here in town, but the discussions there have drug on and fizzled out to the point that it looks like it probably won't work out. So they keep searching, and we all keep waiting.
Ben has also stepped up the job search/applications once again (although, honestly, he's never stopped looking since we got here.) He's still scheduled every afternoon to work a couple hours as a traffic cop for a local school system, and twice a week as a valet at the Charlotte airport. With the end of the school year 2 months away, we've known we need to find something to replace the traffic cop job. But a couple weeks ago we also learned the valet company lost their contract with the airport, so that job will be gone in June as well. (They also sent out an e-mail to their employees this past week warning them that they will begin laying people off sooner rather than later, so we really don't know how much longer Ben will have a job there.) We would LOVE it if Ben could find a decent-paying job here in Rock Hill with early morning/daytime hours (as opposed to evening hours) and good interaction with people.
Rachel has been struggling trying to get enough hours at Panera to keep her budget afloat, while also desiring a daytime job instead of 3rd shift. It looks like an on-call part-time job with another company has opened up for her, so that's great, but something still needs to change with her Panera employment situation!
On a totally DIFFERENT end of the spectrum, Karl Bucher is swamped with work and working long hours in construction/restoration/whatever it is he does. We're praying for change there as well, either a decrease in hours or a totally different job. This man has got some serious skills in wood-working and leather-work as well as horse-training, so it would be great if he could eventually provide for his family using a combination of these things he loves.
SO.... our team hasn't quite been just frolicking through a field of daisies, BUT there's an awful lot of good stuff happening too:
First of all, we had Ben's parents visit for an entire month! We've never had either set of parents living in the same city as us, and I have to say it was WONDERFUL to have "Grandma and Grandpa" here. They were such a huge help with the kids and our schedules, plus it was great to have someone of a "more mature generation" in our Community Group time. And besides that, we just like them. :)
Ben started coaching a city soccer team two weeks ago. Micah LOVES it and looks forward to every Tuesday and Thursday evening. It's just been practices so far and one little scrimmage game, but I have to admit, I haven't seen hardly a thing that happens on the field because I'm chatting with the parents on the sidelines. There are a couple of moms who seem especially "natural" to connect with, and Ben has been enjoying some of the dads. I'm hoping some of these folks are ones the Lord has "planned" for us. Our other team members have also been experiencing some really great breakthroughs in meeting and getting to know folks, especially since it's light out in the evenings and we have warmer days more and more frequently. (Side note: This winter has been unusually snowy/cloudy/chilly for South Carolina, but it feels like an AMAZING winter compared to what we're used to in Ohio. I can't overstate what it does for one's spirit to see so much SUNSHINE during these winter months! I am constantly thankful for that.)
We had a few people tell us a while back that here in the south, we would probably find that it's easy to meet people, but difficult to get "below the surface." Now that we've been here a few months, we're seeing bits and pieces of that. There are some relationships that naturally won't progress much further, like our neighbors (one of the first couples we had over for dinner) who are moving back to Charleston in a couple of weeks. Some relationships we originally formed have fizzled a little because of complications in schedules or sicknesses. (I think I've had play dates scheduled with one friend at least 5 times that had to be canceled because first her kids were sick, then my kids were sick, then her in-laws came for the week, and so on...) Other relationships seem to be deepening slowly but surely. So I guess we'll just keep moving forward, trying to stay sensitive to whatever the Lord is doing in each relationship.
A really great book our team has been going through is called "The Tangible Kingdom" by Hugh Halter and Matt Smay. These guys kind of "accidently" built a church just by building relationships with folks (no strings attached), and the book has been both a big encouragement and also a little daunting (like when they mentioned that they found it often took about 2 years for most of their relationships to deepen to the point where they had some "open doors" spiritually.) I think we've slowly been changing our mindsight from "We're here to build a church" to the mindset of "We're here to love people... and we're thinking in the midst of that, a church will be formed."
One of those things that seems to be a "God thing" is our new involvement with a place called Pilgrim's Inn. This is a place in town where homeless women and children can stay and get back on their feet. It's a very "holistic" approach, helping the women find jobs, get the support they need, find a place to live, totally transform their lives. We've been serving and eating dinner with them "family style" the last Wednesday of each month, and it has been a very natural, wonderful fit for our team. We're also thinking the Lord might have more in store for us there... this may be a possible place for Lindsey to start out leading Refit exercise classes, maybe even for us to start some Sunday morning services. These have just been thoughts or ideas so far, but I wouldn't be surprised if the Lord connects us more deeply with this organization and the women living there.
Speaking of Sunday mornings, we have absolutely nothing in stone, but at this point we are leaning towards starting regular Sunday morning gatherings in January. We'll probably do some "preview services" in the late fall, and maybe start doing some small "in home" services before that.
So that's the nutshell version of our life today. (Actually, if you want to know specifically what TODAY looked like, we skipped church because of yet another intestinal/stomach bug - the Buchers have it too - and I just put Caleb in time out for purposely farting on his brother AGAIN. It's a rainy, movie-watching kind of day, but more sunshine should be on its way later in the week.)
I'm still trying to figure out a more efficient way to move pictures from my phone to my computer, but when I do, I'll put a few up here. :)
****Sad update: about an hour after I published this blog post, we got the call that Sue, Amanda's Mom, has passed away. I know they could use lots of prayers.***
Friday, January 31, 2014
The Most Painful Blessing
Guest post by Seth and Amanda Hanford
Many of you may not know this, but Amanda and I started to pursue adoption shortly after moving to Rock Hill. We arrived in August and sought out an attorney in early September. We had been thinking to do this back in Ohio but with the move, we were just nervous about getting things started with the uncertainty of selling a house and moving while part way through such a process.
Some of you we had a chance to tell when we came back to Ohio around Thanksgiving, but one of our early commitments in the process was that, for the sake of the birth mom and the baby, we would not post about it on social media. Unfortunately I'm able to write about it now because the adoption was disrupted. Even still, there are aspects that we won't disclose publicly because of the possibility that the birth mother might change her mind down the road and revisit the reasons she sought out adoption to begin with, and come back to us asking us to adopt this baby after all.
Since November, Amanda had been developing an ongoing relationship with the birth mom, texting and talking a dozen or more times a day. We had been eagerly getting things ready around the house to welcome our new daughter home. Maddie had been practicing all the things a big sister would need to know --ensuring us that when her baby sister arrived, she would be the one to care for her; we wouldn't have to help, because big sisters know what to do. We took a trip to meet our birth mother, and bought her lunch. From all outward signs, she was excited and engaged, ready to and even looking forward to placing her baby with us.
On Friday, we left Maddie with the Gansons and made the trip to be close by because the birth was imminent. On early Saturday morning, our daughter was born. We had some ups and downs because birth can be a little scary at times, but our birth mom's family and friends were welcoming of us and were very supportive and excited for us. Mom and baby were healthy, though, and we settled in to that exciting discomfort of a new baby with, for a few days, two moms. Amanda spent all day Saturday feeding, changing, bonding with, and loving her daughter. The birth mom spent all day Saturday feeding, changing, bonding with, and loving her daughter
But on Sunday, it all fell apart. Despite all of the love and connections we had made in our heart with our daughter, we were asked to leave. Despite all the tears and anger and uncertainty of what the rest of her life would be like, we knew that our daughter would remain with her birth mother. Despite all of the pain and denial, we knew that our daughter was lost to us. An advisor told us this week to grieve with the perspective that an adoption disrupted after birth is more like experiencing a stillbirth or infant death; we agree.
Even still, we are blessed. Throughout the process, our friends and family have been here for us. Our neighbors, whom we've known for just a few short months, have been some of our best companions in this journey. Even though they and our friends from back home didn't KNOW what was happening on Sunday afternoon, we were absolutely bombarded by prayers, emails, text messages of support and comfort. At least 10 people reached out nearly simultaneously on Sunday with words like "Hey, hope things are going well; for some reason right now, you are on my heart and I knew I needed to write to you. Love ya!"
As we come out of this week, we are reminded of two verses:
In John 8, as Jesus is confronted by the Pharisees and the woman caught in adultery, he stood between their rocks and her vulnerability. He bent down next to her and reassured her that He was there. After He dismissed them, He continued to reassure her. Regardless of the fact that she had indeed transgressed against Him, He was her advocate first and foremost. We, likewise, feel that strong call to be our birth mom's advocate and a blessing to her first, even though her ultimate decision has wounded us.
And then in 1 Peter 3, we are reminded that even when we are suffering, we are blessed, because we suffer for righteousness.
We are heartbroken. But our God is bigger than our grief. We are convinced that we were put in our birth mom's life to walk with her through the last months of her pregnancy. We know that we were chosen for this situation because we could handle the loss. We know that our Savior stood with us from the early days, preparing and supporting us for this eventual, painful decision. He moved the hearts of our friends in unison to support us, prompting them to surround us with care and support in our hour of need. We know that He needed us to be an advocate for our birth mom and for her daughter, at great expense to us but for their great blessing.
We will always have a wound from the trial we endured this weekend. We hope that our birth mom and her daughter will have a great life together. We don't know where to go from here, but we know Who is with us, and we are thankful for you and for all those who have helped us to make it through this week.
Many of you may not know this, but Amanda and I started to pursue adoption shortly after moving to Rock Hill. We arrived in August and sought out an attorney in early September. We had been thinking to do this back in Ohio but with the move, we were just nervous about getting things started with the uncertainty of selling a house and moving while part way through such a process.
Some of you we had a chance to tell when we came back to Ohio around Thanksgiving, but one of our early commitments in the process was that, for the sake of the birth mom and the baby, we would not post about it on social media. Unfortunately I'm able to write about it now because the adoption was disrupted. Even still, there are aspects that we won't disclose publicly because of the possibility that the birth mother might change her mind down the road and revisit the reasons she sought out adoption to begin with, and come back to us asking us to adopt this baby after all.
Since November, Amanda had been developing an ongoing relationship with the birth mom, texting and talking a dozen or more times a day. We had been eagerly getting things ready around the house to welcome our new daughter home. Maddie had been practicing all the things a big sister would need to know --ensuring us that when her baby sister arrived, she would be the one to care for her; we wouldn't have to help, because big sisters know what to do. We took a trip to meet our birth mother, and bought her lunch. From all outward signs, she was excited and engaged, ready to and even looking forward to placing her baby with us.
On Friday, we left Maddie with the Gansons and made the trip to be close by because the birth was imminent. On early Saturday morning, our daughter was born. We had some ups and downs because birth can be a little scary at times, but our birth mom's family and friends were welcoming of us and were very supportive and excited for us. Mom and baby were healthy, though, and we settled in to that exciting discomfort of a new baby with, for a few days, two moms. Amanda spent all day Saturday feeding, changing, bonding with, and loving her daughter. The birth mom spent all day Saturday feeding, changing, bonding with, and loving her daughter
But on Sunday, it all fell apart. Despite all of the love and connections we had made in our heart with our daughter, we were asked to leave. Despite all the tears and anger and uncertainty of what the rest of her life would be like, we knew that our daughter would remain with her birth mother. Despite all of the pain and denial, we knew that our daughter was lost to us. An advisor told us this week to grieve with the perspective that an adoption disrupted after birth is more like experiencing a stillbirth or infant death; we agree.
Even still, we are blessed. Throughout the process, our friends and family have been here for us. Our neighbors, whom we've known for just a few short months, have been some of our best companions in this journey. Even though they and our friends from back home didn't KNOW what was happening on Sunday afternoon, we were absolutely bombarded by prayers, emails, text messages of support and comfort. At least 10 people reached out nearly simultaneously on Sunday with words like "Hey, hope things are going well; for some reason right now, you are on my heart and I knew I needed to write to you. Love ya!"
As we come out of this week, we are reminded of two verses:
In John 8, as Jesus is confronted by the Pharisees and the woman caught in adultery, he stood between their rocks and her vulnerability. He bent down next to her and reassured her that He was there. After He dismissed them, He continued to reassure her. Regardless of the fact that she had indeed transgressed against Him, He was her advocate first and foremost. We, likewise, feel that strong call to be our birth mom's advocate and a blessing to her first, even though her ultimate decision has wounded us.
And then in 1 Peter 3, we are reminded that even when we are suffering, we are blessed, because we suffer for righteousness.
We are heartbroken. But our God is bigger than our grief. We are convinced that we were put in our birth mom's life to walk with her through the last months of her pregnancy. We know that we were chosen for this situation because we could handle the loss. We know that our Savior stood with us from the early days, preparing and supporting us for this eventual, painful decision. He moved the hearts of our friends in unison to support us, prompting them to surround us with care and support in our hour of need. We know that He needed us to be an advocate for our birth mom and for her daughter, at great expense to us but for their great blessing.
We will always have a wound from the trial we endured this weekend. We hope that our birth mom and her daughter will have a great life together. We don't know where to go from here, but we know Who is with us, and we are thankful for you and for all those who have helped us to make it through this week.
Sunday, January 19, 2014
An update from the female half...
Since Ben has already shared his latest "deep thoughts", I figured it's my turn to share the stories and details of how things are going. Warning, I am wordier than my husband. (Shocker.)
Quick recap: we've been here for about two and a half months.
Weeks 1 and 2: unpacking, trying to figure out how not to get lost, a little crying (no need to name names...ahem...) and meeting some neighbors. Job search begins.
About 3 weeks in: we started having some new friends over for dinner. More job searching.
At week 4, we left for two weeks to make holiday visits to each of our families. (Although Ben's parents got the short end of the stick since Abby was sick the whole time we visited them, and ended up in the hospital for three days.) We got back to South Carolina and quarantined ourselves for an additional 5 days while Abby totally recovered. (And Ben job searched.)
Around week 7: We had about a week and a half of "normal life", in which we tried to set up a routine and get to know some more folks... and job searched... then Christmas happened in there somewhere ... and then we once again had to quarantine ourselves for a few days while some nasty sinus colds/coughs/earaches ran their course through our home. Ben's parents came down for a quick visit around New Year's. Have I mentioned Ben spent a lot of time job searching?
Last weekend we had to take another "unexpected" trip to Maryland for my grandmother's funeral (as much as that can be "unexpected" for a 92 year old woman who needed to go home!) While we were there, Ben got a call to come in for a job interview.
BUT... we are well into January and I ***THINK*** normal life is right around the corner. Ben has started working part time as a traffic cop through one of the "rich" school systems about 15-20 minutes from here. It's not ideal because it's not quite enough hours to meet our budget, and it will only last through the school year, but it's better than nothing! He works from 7-8:30 in the morning, then again from 2:00-3:30 in the afternoon, so that gives us some time with him during the day, and he can set up coffee meetings around lunchtime. He can get in some good prayer time while waiting for the school buses, and let's not underestimate the cool-factor of telling all the rich cars what to do. ("That's right, Lexus, you'll stop when he tells you to stop!") Plus he has a glow-in-the-dark wand which is kind of like a light saber. :)
Sometimes it feels like we've been here forever and we're like, "why does this move so SLOOOOOWLY????" Because, you know, it takes time for relationships to form and grow. And then at other times we realize we haven't been here all that long, and despite the "random busyness" of the past couple of months, we have undoubtedly seen God lining up some divine encounters with people.
For instance, the week before Christmas, I woke up on a Wednesday and really felt like I wanted to take the younger kids to the local Children's Museum for storytime. I asked Ben if he wanted to go and he was like, "Eh, it's just going to be stay-at-home Moms. You go, and I'll take Micah to the library to work on some homeschool." So that's what we did. I walked into the museum (which is really more like a big, cool playroom), and was like "jackpot!" If you are a stay-at-home Mom and you want to meet people, this was the place to be. There were probably 30 + women trying to wrangle their toddlers into their laps to hear the story, and I immediately felt drawn to one lady in particular with a little girl the same age as Abby. We hit it off, exchanged numbers, and planned a playdate. After we left the museum, we walked over to the library. There was only one other person in the children's section besides Ben and Micah, and it happened to be a stay-at-home Dad who moved from Ohio last year. He's also one of the friendliest people you'll ever meet once you get him talking. Before we left the library, we all made a "date" to meet him and his 5 young kids (2 sets of twins!) at the science museum that Friday. I don't think the science museum workers knew what hit them. :) Anyway, we really like this guy and his family... I'm hoping we can have them all over for dinner soon.
And about the Mommy friend I met... I was at her house this past week, and the topic of "church" came up. Come to find out she grew up in a church but never really "connected" with it. When I asked what kind of church it was she started out by saying, "Most people have never heard of it. It's called Mennonite." I assured her that I've heard of it. :) I think this is another person I could really enjoy getting to know.
Another thing we did right before Christmas was walk around and hand out cookies to all our neighbors. We got to meet a few more people this way, and we're thinking the group of houses directly connected to our's will be great to have some cook-outs with this summer, since they all seem like pretty laid-back folks who like to "shoot the breeze". It also helps that we all share a backyard. (Side note... about 8 houses down, a big guy came to the door with no shirt on and peeked through the door before opening it. He was like, "Oh cool. I was just making sure it wasn't the cops." Okay. Note to self....)
We've also been encouraged lately by a couple of Rock Hill people who discovered our church's webpage online. One couple used to be involved with a Vineyard in Ohio before they moved to South Carolina, and we instantly "clicked" with them when we met. We're not sure what God's plan is yet with how this couple will be involved with us, but my goodness, have they been a joy to us.
Another guy named Khon found and emailed us at the prompting of his brother who attends the Columbus Vineyard. We had him over for dinner this past Tuesday, and it felt like the Holy Spirit just came and resided with us the entire evening. Khon is from Laos and became a Christian about a year and a half ago, after trying Buddhism for a while. He has a crazy busy schedule as an engineer and is starting his own business, but he has read the Bible through multiple times this past year and is constantly in prayer and worship. It's like the Lord is taking him through "spiritual boot camp." It was such a huge encouragement to sit with him, hear his story, pray together, and dream. At some point during the evening, he said, "Do you guys ever feel emotional when you think about the Lord? Like the Holy Spirit is just so sweet you feel like crying and it feels like you've got tingles all over your head and the hairs on the back of your neck stand up?" We assured him that's the presence of the Lord, and he said, "That's how I've felt since I've walked into your house." Thank you, Lord. May that be the experience of everyone who steps foot in here.
This past week we crossed two milestones: we had our first "native" Rock Hiller come to a Wednesday community group, and us girls had another "native" come to our "micro-group" on Saturday morning. (When you see "micro-group", you can read it as "excuse for Moms to get together and drink coffee without the kids." Actually, the guys and girls take turns on Saturday mornings getting together, and it's been some really, really good time of deep discipleship and encouragement.)
For the most part, we're still trying to feel out what we're supposed to be doing here. We know God called us here, and so we know he has people planned for us. He's already at work. Our job is to keep meeting people and loving them, and pray. I was reminded of something I read in a "Mom book" a while back... that an apple tree doesn't worry about what's going to happen to its apples; it just keeps producing fruit. Someone might come pick every apple and make it all into applesauce or apple pies... or most of the apples might just fall to the ground and rot or get eaten by animals... and maybe a few eventually turn into trees, but a lot also just seem to be wasted. But that's okay, because we're supposed to just keep producing fruit (or better said, letting the Lord produce fruit in us) and he'll worry about where it falls or how it is used. So as we keep meeting and getting to know people, we're aware that some of these folks may never choose to follow Jesus. Some folks may follow Jesus and never be apart of "our" church. Some folks may be sent to us to build Vineyard Church of Rock Hill. But it's freeing to know that none of that is really "up to us", and it allows us to just love and enjoy people unconditionally, no strings attached, instead of turning them into some sort of "project."
Speaking of fruit, God spoke another lesson to me this week through my children. With being gone most of last weekend, it felt like we jumped into a busy week without much rest... Monday through Wednesday it was like we hit the ground running in the morning and kept working after the kids were in bed. We had plans each evening, and just had a lot of "extra stuff" like playdates scheduled during the day that threw off the "normal to-do list" (and... for those who don't know me, I kind of like my structures and schedules. Monday is grocery shopping day, people. If I don't go on Monday, I don't know when to work it in. That's how I roll.)
So Wednesday afternoon while I was working in the kitchen, I started getting that tight-chested feeling, and I had all these thoughts running through my head of what I needed to do. We're realizing that with Ben starting this job and hopefully finding another to go with it, we'll be using most of our evenings every week to host people in our home, and life will just keep getting busier the closer we get to starting Sunday morning gatherings. So I stood there praying, "Lord, am I going to have enough emotional and physical energy to get through these first years? Can I sustain this kind of schedule?" And Abby comes over asking for "gapes". So I pluck off some grapes for her. Then Micah wants grapes, so I pluck them off for him. Then Caleb comes over and wants grapes, but "like these", pointing to a cluster. "Like what?" "Like with the stick still on." "Oh, like the ones that are still... " In my head it pops: ABIDING. That's how we're going to make it through the craziness and uncertainty of church-planting: by abiding in Christ.
So please continue to pray for us. For continued guidance with jobs, for divine encounters, for sustainable schedules, and that we would, above all, abide.
(One last note: Your prayers certainly worked for our teammates, the Buchers. Last you heard from us, they were trying to find a job and a house. This past week, we actually prayed that Karl's work would ease up a little because he's gotten so many hours, and a couple weeks ago they moved into a great house that seems strategically located in downtown Rock Hill. We know your prayers are heard, and our Father is always good. Thank you!!!)
Quick recap: we've been here for about two and a half months.
Weeks 1 and 2: unpacking, trying to figure out how not to get lost, a little crying (no need to name names...ahem...) and meeting some neighbors. Job search begins.
About 3 weeks in: we started having some new friends over for dinner. More job searching.
At week 4, we left for two weeks to make holiday visits to each of our families. (Although Ben's parents got the short end of the stick since Abby was sick the whole time we visited them, and ended up in the hospital for three days.) We got back to South Carolina and quarantined ourselves for an additional 5 days while Abby totally recovered. (And Ben job searched.)
Around week 7: We had about a week and a half of "normal life", in which we tried to set up a routine and get to know some more folks... and job searched... then Christmas happened in there somewhere ... and then we once again had to quarantine ourselves for a few days while some nasty sinus colds/coughs/earaches ran their course through our home. Ben's parents came down for a quick visit around New Year's. Have I mentioned Ben spent a lot of time job searching?
Last weekend we had to take another "unexpected" trip to Maryland for my grandmother's funeral (as much as that can be "unexpected" for a 92 year old woman who needed to go home!) While we were there, Ben got a call to come in for a job interview.
BUT... we are well into January and I ***THINK*** normal life is right around the corner. Ben has started working part time as a traffic cop through one of the "rich" school systems about 15-20 minutes from here. It's not ideal because it's not quite enough hours to meet our budget, and it will only last through the school year, but it's better than nothing! He works from 7-8:30 in the morning, then again from 2:00-3:30 in the afternoon, so that gives us some time with him during the day, and he can set up coffee meetings around lunchtime. He can get in some good prayer time while waiting for the school buses, and let's not underestimate the cool-factor of telling all the rich cars what to do. ("That's right, Lexus, you'll stop when he tells you to stop!") Plus he has a glow-in-the-dark wand which is kind of like a light saber. :)
Sometimes it feels like we've been here forever and we're like, "why does this move so SLOOOOOWLY????" Because, you know, it takes time for relationships to form and grow. And then at other times we realize we haven't been here all that long, and despite the "random busyness" of the past couple of months, we have undoubtedly seen God lining up some divine encounters with people.
For instance, the week before Christmas, I woke up on a Wednesday and really felt like I wanted to take the younger kids to the local Children's Museum for storytime. I asked Ben if he wanted to go and he was like, "Eh, it's just going to be stay-at-home Moms. You go, and I'll take Micah to the library to work on some homeschool." So that's what we did. I walked into the museum (which is really more like a big, cool playroom), and was like "jackpot!" If you are a stay-at-home Mom and you want to meet people, this was the place to be. There were probably 30 + women trying to wrangle their toddlers into their laps to hear the story, and I immediately felt drawn to one lady in particular with a little girl the same age as Abby. We hit it off, exchanged numbers, and planned a playdate. After we left the museum, we walked over to the library. There was only one other person in the children's section besides Ben and Micah, and it happened to be a stay-at-home Dad who moved from Ohio last year. He's also one of the friendliest people you'll ever meet once you get him talking. Before we left the library, we all made a "date" to meet him and his 5 young kids (2 sets of twins!) at the science museum that Friday. I don't think the science museum workers knew what hit them. :) Anyway, we really like this guy and his family... I'm hoping we can have them all over for dinner soon.
And about the Mommy friend I met... I was at her house this past week, and the topic of "church" came up. Come to find out she grew up in a church but never really "connected" with it. When I asked what kind of church it was she started out by saying, "Most people have never heard of it. It's called Mennonite." I assured her that I've heard of it. :) I think this is another person I could really enjoy getting to know.
Another thing we did right before Christmas was walk around and hand out cookies to all our neighbors. We got to meet a few more people this way, and we're thinking the group of houses directly connected to our's will be great to have some cook-outs with this summer, since they all seem like pretty laid-back folks who like to "shoot the breeze". It also helps that we all share a backyard. (Side note... about 8 houses down, a big guy came to the door with no shirt on and peeked through the door before opening it. He was like, "Oh cool. I was just making sure it wasn't the cops." Okay. Note to self....)
We've also been encouraged lately by a couple of Rock Hill people who discovered our church's webpage online. One couple used to be involved with a Vineyard in Ohio before they moved to South Carolina, and we instantly "clicked" with them when we met. We're not sure what God's plan is yet with how this couple will be involved with us, but my goodness, have they been a joy to us.
Another guy named Khon found and emailed us at the prompting of his brother who attends the Columbus Vineyard. We had him over for dinner this past Tuesday, and it felt like the Holy Spirit just came and resided with us the entire evening. Khon is from Laos and became a Christian about a year and a half ago, after trying Buddhism for a while. He has a crazy busy schedule as an engineer and is starting his own business, but he has read the Bible through multiple times this past year and is constantly in prayer and worship. It's like the Lord is taking him through "spiritual boot camp." It was such a huge encouragement to sit with him, hear his story, pray together, and dream. At some point during the evening, he said, "Do you guys ever feel emotional when you think about the Lord? Like the Holy Spirit is just so sweet you feel like crying and it feels like you've got tingles all over your head and the hairs on the back of your neck stand up?" We assured him that's the presence of the Lord, and he said, "That's how I've felt since I've walked into your house." Thank you, Lord. May that be the experience of everyone who steps foot in here.
This past week we crossed two milestones: we had our first "native" Rock Hiller come to a Wednesday community group, and us girls had another "native" come to our "micro-group" on Saturday morning. (When you see "micro-group", you can read it as "excuse for Moms to get together and drink coffee without the kids." Actually, the guys and girls take turns on Saturday mornings getting together, and it's been some really, really good time of deep discipleship and encouragement.)
For the most part, we're still trying to feel out what we're supposed to be doing here. We know God called us here, and so we know he has people planned for us. He's already at work. Our job is to keep meeting people and loving them, and pray. I was reminded of something I read in a "Mom book" a while back... that an apple tree doesn't worry about what's going to happen to its apples; it just keeps producing fruit. Someone might come pick every apple and make it all into applesauce or apple pies... or most of the apples might just fall to the ground and rot or get eaten by animals... and maybe a few eventually turn into trees, but a lot also just seem to be wasted. But that's okay, because we're supposed to just keep producing fruit (or better said, letting the Lord produce fruit in us) and he'll worry about where it falls or how it is used. So as we keep meeting and getting to know people, we're aware that some of these folks may never choose to follow Jesus. Some folks may follow Jesus and never be apart of "our" church. Some folks may be sent to us to build Vineyard Church of Rock Hill. But it's freeing to know that none of that is really "up to us", and it allows us to just love and enjoy people unconditionally, no strings attached, instead of turning them into some sort of "project."
Speaking of fruit, God spoke another lesson to me this week through my children. With being gone most of last weekend, it felt like we jumped into a busy week without much rest... Monday through Wednesday it was like we hit the ground running in the morning and kept working after the kids were in bed. We had plans each evening, and just had a lot of "extra stuff" like playdates scheduled during the day that threw off the "normal to-do list" (and... for those who don't know me, I kind of like my structures and schedules. Monday is grocery shopping day, people. If I don't go on Monday, I don't know when to work it in. That's how I roll.)
So Wednesday afternoon while I was working in the kitchen, I started getting that tight-chested feeling, and I had all these thoughts running through my head of what I needed to do. We're realizing that with Ben starting this job and hopefully finding another to go with it, we'll be using most of our evenings every week to host people in our home, and life will just keep getting busier the closer we get to starting Sunday morning gatherings. So I stood there praying, "Lord, am I going to have enough emotional and physical energy to get through these first years? Can I sustain this kind of schedule?" And Abby comes over asking for "gapes". So I pluck off some grapes for her. Then Micah wants grapes, so I pluck them off for him. Then Caleb comes over and wants grapes, but "like these", pointing to a cluster. "Like what?" "Like with the stick still on." "Oh, like the ones that are still... " In my head it pops: ABIDING. That's how we're going to make it through the craziness and uncertainty of church-planting: by abiding in Christ.
So please continue to pray for us. For continued guidance with jobs, for divine encounters, for sustainable schedules, and that we would, above all, abide.
(One last note: Your prayers certainly worked for our teammates, the Buchers. Last you heard from us, they were trying to find a job and a house. This past week, we actually prayed that Karl's work would ease up a little because he's gotten so many hours, and a couple weeks ago they moved into a great house that seems strategically located in downtown Rock Hill. We know your prayers are heard, and our Father is always good. Thank you!!!)
Friday, January 17, 2014
A Good Dad
One of the consistent things God has been reminding me over the past year is- he is a very good Dad.
Regardless of how good your dad was growing up, God is much, much better. He is all of your dad's best qualities times a million. He is constantly looking out for us. He loves to provide for us. He is pleased with us. He loves being around us. He doesn't manipulate us, He doesn't have any hidden agendas, He doesn't have any ulterior motives, He is not burdened by us.
One of my favorite quotes comes from Martin Luther- "Prayer is not overcoming God's reluctance. It is laying hold of His willingness." That has stuck with me because I have a tendency to view prayer and many other aspects of my relationship with God as an attempt to convince God to bless me. Sometimes I even have the feeling that I need to change God's mind or bend His will in my favor (or in the favor of the person I am praying for).
But in reality that mindset has nothing to do with the gospel. It is paganism, not Christianity. Paganism says if I offer the right sacrifice... enough sacrifice, the right kind, and in the right way, my god will bless me. But the beauty is, this isn't how the Bible portrays God. He loves us, He is in favor of us, He is pleased to give us the kingdom.
He is a good Dad. We can trust Him with every detail of our lives. We don't have to "guard" what we say to Him because He is on our side. We don't have to gain His approval, bend His will, or overcome His reluctance.
This is one of my main desires in church planting. To help people realize how great our Dad is and to walk in that truth. When we know how good He is, it changes everything.
Regardless of how good your dad was growing up, God is much, much better. He is all of your dad's best qualities times a million. He is constantly looking out for us. He loves to provide for us. He is pleased with us. He loves being around us. He doesn't manipulate us, He doesn't have any hidden agendas, He doesn't have any ulterior motives, He is not burdened by us.
One of my favorite quotes comes from Martin Luther- "Prayer is not overcoming God's reluctance. It is laying hold of His willingness." That has stuck with me because I have a tendency to view prayer and many other aspects of my relationship with God as an attempt to convince God to bless me. Sometimes I even have the feeling that I need to change God's mind or bend His will in my favor (or in the favor of the person I am praying for).
But in reality that mindset has nothing to do with the gospel. It is paganism, not Christianity. Paganism says if I offer the right sacrifice... enough sacrifice, the right kind, and in the right way, my god will bless me. But the beauty is, this isn't how the Bible portrays God. He loves us, He is in favor of us, He is pleased to give us the kingdom.
He is a good Dad. We can trust Him with every detail of our lives. We don't have to "guard" what we say to Him because He is on our side. We don't have to gain His approval, bend His will, or overcome His reluctance.
This is one of my main desires in church planting. To help people realize how great our Dad is and to walk in that truth. When we know how good He is, it changes everything.
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